Work to Live OR Live to Work?

Apparently I am part of the 'Y generation'.  Kids born in the 70's/80's that have watched their parents work long hours and scramble for money and status. Our parents have worked to put dinner on our plates, to afford a summer holiday, to keep up with what is expected of them.

But the Y generation are now grown up and have a completely different set of priorities and demands. We care less about salaries and more about lifestyle, flexible hours of work, time to travel, volunteer opportunities - basically a better work-life balance.

But do we deserve these choices? And if we do live with better life balance then what will become of our children?

I had a deep debate with Tae-Sun about this recently. We both discussed what we want within the next 5 years. Turns out we want roughly the same. I want to do another year or so of teaching in a school environment...then i'd like to go it alone and within my home i'd like to become a part-time private tutor (all legally of course!)  Tae-Sun would still have the businesses and id work for him too. We've thrown around the idea of opening another cafe/bar with some sort of language exchange to it but we're not completely convinced this would work long-term. But working for myself/for Tae would give me flexible working hours/time to have a baby when one comes along and more time to enjoy life.

My first job was back when I was 14 - since then ive been proud to have always had a job, whether it was part-time whilst studying or full time after University. Saving for travelling has meant that for alot of my working life (back in the UK) I even had 2 jobs - part-time bar work in the evenings became a regular thing for me. I've never been one to shy-away from hard work. I actually enjoyed most of my jobs. But as im getting older, and im only 27 - why do I feel more and more that work just isnt important to me??

I wish I could be a career girl - to strive to be the best in my chosen industry and work in a top company. That's what people seem to want out here in Korea. Children seem to be striving all their life to become the best here - education is the most important thing in their lives from an early age - the kids literally study every waking hour (or so it seems) and sleep an average of 5-6 hours per night. They all aim to be top of the class and achieve a place at one of the few exceptional Seoul universities. But what for?

What happens once they've achieved all this? Do the men then just work work work until its time to retire? Do the women throw the career away once its time for babies?

Tae-Sun has the bar and a restaurant. He works on average 17 hours per day. To me this is insane. But that's how he has been brought up - he thinks only about the future/saving for a family/providing for his parents in their old age. This is one of the reasons I love him - he's never selfish and NEVER lazy. But, I also think he's absolutely crazy for never putting himself first.

Tae-sun mentioned to me today that he feels he is getting lazy. He used to open up the restaurant and work there through the day, before having a quick shower/dinner and then heading to his bar to work until 4/5am. He would literally do this 7 days a week with no break. But since we're together and he's living with me, he tends to come home from the bar a little earlier and whilst im up for work at 8am, he's sleeping in until midday. He now feels that because he has staff in place to open up, he should be using the few hours in the middle of the day to get ANOTHER job or study or even make something ^^ 

I know Koreans will have a completely different mind-set having been a country (technically) still at war since the 1950's - they have worked so hard to rebuild this country and have gone from having nothing to having it all. I have never experienced such a hard-working society like Korea. Thailand in comparison, was so relaxed the people were literally horizontal!! ^^ 

I guess my point is - what is the right balance? Living and working in a country where work comes first often makes me feel guilty for expecting 'a lifestyle' and for not wanting a 'career'. I'm happy to spend my time doing what makes me happy, as long its in a positive environment and preferably has cute little kids then im all set!! (I suppose that's why English teaching is so ideal for me).

I'd be interested to know what you guys think...